Sexuality

The sexual response

Traditionally perceived women’s sexual response as the different stages that follow one another in a specific order: first, there must be six, then comes the sexual arousal with moistening of the vagina and tickling warmth around the genitals. So rising lust until orgasm where desire culminates before moderating. Recent research shows that such a linear pattern in which the different stages follow each other like pearls on a string, far from always fit with her own experience. Many women describe such projections and overlapping phases – and how some sexual situations when fast forward to a climax, others will be marked by a long and intense sexual arousal, which does not culminate in an orgasm.

Nor male sexual response follows a straight line, and there may be large differences in the duration of the different phases from time to time. Often the man has the desire to have the desire, then he becomes sexually aroused and feel that the penis fills with blood and rises. This arousal or lust gradually grows in intensity until he gets ejaculation and orgasm. Men may experience ejaculation orgasm without any special experience – and it is also possible (although it requires little training) to experience an orgasm without associated ejaculation.

Reasons arousal and desire

From a biological point of view, arousal, desire and orgasm complex phenomena, involving both circuits, muscle, nervous system and hormones. Also on the psychosocial level, the motives for sexual feelings and actions be many, and on top of it purely bodily desires, a sexual encounter also involve feelings of tenderness, warmth, closeness, love, confidence, confirmation or desire to reward or pleasure his partner. In addition, sexuality for many couples act as a kind of lightning rod or valve where cohabitation problems and conflicts can be handled in a constructive manner and without words. Finally, sexuality is a play with boundaries – and sexual experiments (e.g., with or role-playing toys) is for some couples give to edge relationship and suit.

For centuries, we researched the differences between women’s and men’s sexuality. Previously it was assumed that women did not have sexual feelings, and until recent times was actually a big difference between the two-sex sexual behavior. The differences were hardly biological, but a product of societal norms. Today there is no age at which men and women start to be sexually active, and they have on average the same number of partners. They sometimes say that women give sex to get love while men give love to get sex – but you have to be very careful of the kind of generalizations. Sexuality is controlled to a high degree of social and cultural norms, and there are probably neither women nor men who live their sexuality in full without limitations. Moreover belong neither men nor women the uniform, homogeneous groups, and disparities in the male group and women’s group is probably greater than the differences between the two sexes.

Sexual desire often arises, if you see, hear, smell or feel anything sexually arousing. But desire can also occur spontaneously, so to speak, come out of thin air. Many people have also seen their partner put up for sex at a time when they had no desire but the desire arose gradually.

Lack of desire and arousal

In women aged between 18 and 60 years is the most common sexual problem for little or no desire for sex, while only a few men in the same age group have this problem. Sexual desire and arousal varies over the course of a person’s life and in some phases of life fills the sexual naturally less than in others. A good example is the maternity period, where both men and women find that sex for a while is put on stand-by.

So it is quite natural that sexual desire fluctuates, but you experience that for long periods it hard to feel light and get excited, there may be reason to do something about the situation. This may for example mean that you talk to your partner about the case, so there are no misunderstandings. Or you can seek help and advice from their doctor or a sex therapist.

Men usually experience an erection when they become sexually excited, and failing erection in spite of lust can be a problem, it is possible to treat. Sudden or unexplained erectile dysfunction can also be a sign of an unhealthy lifestyle or underlying disease (eg, diabetes or cardiovascular disease) and therefore can talk to your doctor is a good idea.

Also, women may find that they are sexually excited without the clitoris swells and the vagina becomes moist. It can just as in men be a sign of underlying disease – but it can also be a normal phenomenon. If you as a woman experiencing it as a problem that the sexual organs do not respond to sexual arousal or stimulation, you may discuss the matter with his doctor.

Sexual dysfunctions may be generally due to illness / treatment, and they can be triggered by psychological problems (e.g., sadness or poor self-esteem) and relationships conflicts. Moreover, it can be difficult to maintain a good sex life, if you abuse alcohol, marijuana or hard drugs.

The best prerequisites for maintaining a good sex life are to live healthy and to give room to caress, tenderness and warmth in everyday life. This also applies to older people whose sex life can continue well into old age if it is actively maintained.

Finally, there is evidence that women with a good sense of their pelvic floor (obtained through regular pelvic floor exercises) are easier to achieve sexual pleasure. Also men can probably benefit from training their pelvic floor.